Personal Notes from Suzanne for November 2011
As we move into the direction of winter, there is a deep and darkening reflection of this past year and how much each of us has been forced to let go. The consensus seems to be that each and every one of us has been in an enormous process of letting go.
For some, that let go has been of friendships. Whether through the natural process of death or through the dramatic and upsetting changes that happens as each of us grows out of our old places and friendships.
Sometimes the universe calls us to step onto our path. There are those friendships that cannot step with us or will not because it is not part of their destiny. In this way, the losses of friendships have been particularly hard for many.
The changes that each person is going through are deeply personal and often difficult to explain to others. When that happens, and we feel as if we cannot seem to communicate where we are at, that is often the crack that breaks the old world away from us to reveal a new and previously unrevealed world.
The question at the moment seems to be whether we like this new world or not.
It is like in the movie “The Matrix” where you get to choose between the red and blue pill.
All the universe offers is the truth. Sometimes the truth is not pretty. Sometimes the truth is a harsh and a difficult pill to swallow.
Then the lesson becomes acceptance of the present moment. That somehow this moment is divine and perfect.
These astrological aspects of letting go have spilled into areas of letting go of our old reality, our old jobs, our old ego structures, our homes, our financial stability, etc.
There is nothing stabile about this time that we are in. The question becomes, “How quickly can you let go of the old and embrace the new?” “How quickly can you adapt to this new environment in which you realize that you do not have any control over others.
In fact, you may feel as if you barely have control over yourself.
I have heard so many heart wrenching stories from clients that I find myself in deep contemplative places of compassion for them and myself. It is one thing to feel as if there is a wonderful and natural flow that is life when things are going relatively well. It is when things are challenging that the true metal of each person comes to the foreground.
We love the movies when the main character is challenged and manages to come through it intact only to win in the end.
But doing it personally is so much less glorious than the movies.
I find the world sitting at the edge of its own reality. For some we see a precipice like the old images of the ships going to the end of the world and seeing the ocean pouring into the abyss of space. For others there is a sense of impending doom as we wake up from a deep disturbing dream only to awaken to a world very different than we were expecting.
In the older generation, many tell me that they do not have faith in the direction of our planet and country right now because they have never seen so many people wanting to tear down and break apart rather than work together and find solutions. That is what they believed America was about.
What has happened to the common goals of the greater good for all? The older generation is shocked and dismayed by the narrowness of the mindsets of those in charge and the rigidity of those making decisions that affect so many.
So many have told me that they did everything that their parents told them to do: pay your bills, stay in stabile jobs, be supportive of your community, pay your taxes, be responsible, teach good morals and ethics to your children, etc.
But this cycle has taken so many good, honest, honorable, citizens and made them into lower class citizens and they are still bewildered as to how it happened. The speed at which it all broke down has also been remarkable.
It is as if a tornado came through each of our realities and with no warning stripped everything to the ground.
So when you feel exhausted and overwhelmed with this reality, stop and see that everyone is also in this boat with you. You are not alone in this feeling.
So now what do we do to get motivated and move forward? We can never go back. We have to let go of all the longing for that which we no longer have. We have to come to peace with this moment. We have to find the jewels in the mud of this reality. There will be different gifts than the previous cycle. But there are gifts to be found.
Take a moment to forgive yourself for not knowing how to let the past go. Put the past in a bubble and let it float away from you. Cut the cords that are dragging your thoughts backwards and trying to find answers when there are no answers to find.
There is only acceptance that each person is doing what he or she believes to be right. There is no right or wrong there are only the choices and lessons that each of us choose to take on in this life.
I pray for the goddess to be merciful on all of us as we struggle to find a new flow in our lives.
Better times will come. But for now, just breathe into this moment and allow yourself to find a stable place to stand. That is enough for this moment. Be in the stillness of these seasonal changes. Allow something to find its roots. It will bloom with the time is right and the conditions allow for growth.
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