Death and the Journey of Ego

Below is a response to a question posed to me by a client. I thought it an interesting question and of value to others about the journey in life around death and the ego. I hope you enjoy it.

God works in mysterious ways and while I know and fully believe in intuitive hits and messages from the divine I know also that somehow in the end it does not look like I have pictured it but the truth is still there regardless. What I am trying to say is that the journey that the universe is presenting is already putting you through a process and that process is somehow essential to the unfolding of karma or emotional releasing that is necessary for your growth and development. Again, things are often presented way in advance so you can begin the process of detaching.

I will give a personal example. When I was 21 years old I knew my father was going to die of a heart attack also. I knew he was not okay and tried to talk to him about it. He kept saying for me to not worry that he was fine. And year after year he was still alive, despite everything in my body and soul telling me that he was not okay. 6 years later he had his first heart attack. He had triple bypass surgery, coded 2 times on the operating table, then caught tuberculosis from the hospital that no one caught for 6 months and broke his back from coughing before someone finally diagnosed it correctly. 

About 4 times he could have died but he did not. 8 years later he had another heart attack and after that second one he admitted that when I had a concern about his heart when I was 21 years old. He knew that he had a problem but he did not want to worry me. Again and again he continued to have heart attacks for 22 years until the last set was it and he did die. 

When we went through his papers also at the time when I was 21 we discovered a suicide note written in his hand. He was very angry and upset with some financial investments and felt like a failure and also wanted to leave at that same period I was feeling the death energy so strongly. So death was stalking him for a long time. 

I was right but not right, do you see?

The universe speaks in the language of feelings not necessarily facts. In our western mind world we want the numbers, dates, and facts. It is rarely that simple. Life and the journey is a complex web of dharmas and karmas.

Because of being given the information about my father at 21, I consistently worked on our relationship and communication. It was rough, it was frustrating for him as he did not like talking about deep feelings, etc. But in the end I had the best communication with my father over anyone in my family including my mother. It was so pronounced that as he was dying he said to me, "Why is everyone acting so strange?"

I told him that family members had issues that they had not worked out with him. He asked me to help them with them. I told him that I was trying to do just that but grief is a hard emotion for people to navigate much less then adding the past woundings and issues on top of it.

He then said, "But we are okay, right?" I told him that we were great! He knew that I loved him and I knew that he loved me and that was all there was to it. As a result his death for me was peaceful, beautiful and without regret. That in of itself was a beautiful gift. 

I did loose my father at 72 years old but he went 30 years past my initial prediction and I am a psychic.

I give you this because in the psychic realm we have a saying, "It is always hardest to read timing on the ones closest to you." Because of that I look at everything I get about death with my family members as metaphoric first and foremost rather than literal. 

What I mean by that is ask yourself this question, "What do I need to go through emotionally, spiritually, energetically if this information is true?" Then take yourself through that process ahead of time, step by step. Watch yourself grow and see who you become.

The other piece that I want to say is that whenever there is an intense piece of information given psychically the ego mind with make up a story to soften the blow. These things usually cannot be trusted. What I mean is that I believe that you are feeling a truth in that your husband will leave the planet before you and you need to start looking at your attachments and begin to soften some issues internally. It would also be wise to get a huge life insurance policy on your husband to protect you financially just in case. But the piece about the lottery and getting the money is potentially an ego piece to distract you from the other emotional pieces that need to be processed.

I have too many people to count that believe that they will win the lottery and none of them have ever won. It is a huge ego attachment hook for most and a piece that cannot be completely be trusted. 

I have also met lottery winners and lets just say that none of them really believed they would get it but they hoped and none of them made a bargain with the universe to get the prize. Now all of those sentiments and ideas are beautiful and it is showing that you want to work with children and my suggestion is to being a foundation or charity for children right now. You do not need to wait for the money. Almost everything in life is earned. Money flows where the heart is willing to go first. If you step on the path the money may follow in a very different fashion that you are seeing. 

Intuition is a tricking thing because angels are working to help you complete karmas, attachments, and beliefs that have outgrown their usefulness. So take it with a grain of salt. Protect yourself. Trust that no matter what transpires that you are protected and in the divines arms. The issue you seem to be working on is trust. 

I have learned that it is never about trusting the information, it is about trusting myself that no matter what the universe throws my way that I will be okay. Lots of details and facts are often an indication of ego and mind in action. 

So step back. Know that you are feeling something. Try to not let your mind create a story to make it okay. Because you are okay right now. You are protected right now. The universe is asking for your full presence and love in this moment. They are calling you to wakefulness and attention. Be here now. Love fully this man you are with. Give him everything and if he leaves then you will feel that you have lived and loved so deeply that you and him can die complete in that loving. 

That is often what the universe wants to give you. That full love that is not held back. I know that any of us can leave in an instant. The universe always knows better than us. Trust that and know in your heart that you will be safe.

Love and light to you.